If you live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area you, no doubt, have heard of  The Poor Bride from Waxahachie, Texas. She has been on local radio, in the newspapers and has appeared as a guest on local news channels. At first I was really in her corner…then I visited her website. I’m sure my opinion is not going to sit well with people…and that’s okay…it’s my opinion.

Jamie and Jackie are young. They want to get married. They want a big-ish wedding. They have had hard times and are financially unable to afford the wedding of their dreams. They have a really moving and sweet love story. You can visit their website and read their entire story at www.thepoorbride.com.

• The need…supplies, services and cash for a wedding. A honeymoon.
• The method…create a website, radio spots and news reports that will generate the fulfillment of the needs.

You have to give credit to Jackie for the ingenuity of building a website with their plea for help. Very creative. The website is not really all that impressive but how many people actually follow through with what they perceive is a brilliant idea. You simply must give Jackie credit for coming up with such an intelligent plan to meet their wedding needs.

I don’t know why people here in Texas are so upset over their website. In the north it is common practice to hold a pre-wedding raffle. My sister-in-law (who is a Yankee converted to Texan by marriage) told me that up north they will buy some big ticket item like a big screen TV and sell raffle tickets for the chance to win it. Then the proceeds from the raffle help to fund the wedding and the honeymoon.

Here’s where I disagree with Jamie and Jackie’s plea. What is the point of such a big wedding when:

1. You already have a kid out of wedlock with somebody else and
2. You have already been living together for quite some time.

This all seems to put a bad taste in my mouth for generosity and sacrificing on my part. I know…we all make mistakes…ya-da, ya-da, ya-da

I would rather donate to a couple who has saved themselves for each other (that means they didn’t sample the “goodies” before they married). Whose love story was a struggle to uphold the virtues taught them by their parents, grandparents and church. I did notice they pulled the “God” card on their website but also noticed they don’t mention attending any church. If they are attending church why is their church not supporting them? Are they getting married in a church?

I have been married for over 22 years. We waited to have children until after we were married. We had a small ceremony paid for by us and our parents. I saved money by making all the decorations myself, designing and creating all the floral arrangements, carefully selecting the printer for the invitations (nowadays, you could print these yourself with a PC and a printer), we bought matching bridesmaid dresses on sale from a local store and we drove to our honeymoon location. I also wore my mother’s wedding dress (from my parents wedding over 43 years ago). It was awesome!

I’m just sayin’…

Whether or not I feel inclined to support their wedding adventure I wish Jackie and Jamie the best of luck. Marriage is hard enough with  a clean, smooth start much less with few snags before you get it going. I would encourage the couple to invest in their life together with some pre-marriage and then marriage counseling. If they are attending a church this would be something that a pastor or an associate pastor could do for them. I pray that Jamie and Jackie have a blessed wedding day and a long happy life together.

What are your thoughts? Do you agree with asking for donations for extravagant weddings and honeymoons in Hawaii? Are you going to make a donation to them?

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